(March 17, Thursday)
It was my second to last day before I headed home. Of course, with every new event comes a new process of thinking in my world of complexity. Thoughts ranged from putting together my resumé, applying for a job, planning my Spring break with my brothers and friends, my relationship status, and other subtle subconscious troubles from each previous day this week. Was I happy? I don’t know. I was ready to go home and I convinced myself that I was happy of this matter. In light of all that was and is hectic in my college life, Spring break would be an opportunity to break free.
Inevitably my past experience with dealing with relationships got me thinking deeper. I must have developed an inferiority complex, minus acts of aggression (which would be against myself anyway). My subconscious causes me to overcompensate in situations whether it be in academics or relationships. I worry about my personality as people befriend me and spend time with me. I worry that my grades are merely representative of my hard work and not my passion, which extends beyond my ability. I worry–needless worries that I cannot control without being convinced of inner peace that everything will indeed be alright.