My thoughts are there, I just do not know how to present them. There is no simple way, that I can think of, to be sentimental without sounding ridiculous. I cannot wait for the day when I shoo away the shy in me and share my true feelings through spoken words. It will be more personal, close, and affective. To think, that I, could change the way people think by showing the courage to stand up for my beliefs and conclusions about reality.
You must notice, I am a fan of irony. However, I bite my lip in anticipation only hoping you would catch it. “Clearly he knows how to present his rambling thoughts.” I suppose I resort to this sort of explanation in my lack of “explaining expertise.” Maybe it is because the thoughts which come and go are often too complex for my anxious mind to handle. They are deep, yes, so deep, deep enough that darkness covers my hand as I feel for solutions, answers, explanations.
I am not giving up, though. I find joy in my self-given purpose to give purpose to others. Is the fact that I sweat while writing these words any more convincing? It is the anxiety; the not knowing of the outcome. So, I write carefully, for him, for her, for you.
Say it with me, “I am not giving up.”