My heart

Overwhelming joy and hope possess me
Yet instantaneously I’m drawn back
Back to the image I dreaded to see
A Hole in My Heart, a heart not full–black.
There is a want for change, change of the heart
Will power satisfy my desires
Or willpower to fulfill my own part?
Naught can I alter, like forest fires.
One of whom one may smile I deeply want
To be may be all the more dangerous
A mind of trickery, like one to haunt
I am a stranger, lost and contagious.
None may understand such shame, pain, and fear
It continues day by day, year by year.

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